Quitting Smoking, Back at Day 1

I had a cigarette yesterday. Ok. I ended up having 3 cigarettes yesterday. I’m very disappointed but today is a new day and I am starting the day count over. I am not giving up.

At first, I was completely pissed at myself for the cigarette. I began the self-chastising but that didn’t last very long. I’m never going to make it through this process if I can’t be gentle with myself about it. Kicking myself when I’m down is not going to be helpful but harmful. Yes, there are parts of me that are still disappointed but all I can do to keep this moving forward is start again so that is what I am doing.

Before I had a cigarette yesterday, I was going through some serious withdrawal symptoms, ones I would have never expected. We were working on cleaning the common areas at the condo complex that we clean and my right arm started to go numb. I made myself slow down and focused on my breathing, taking deep breaths. It eventually subsided but then I started feeling really light-headed and I was getting those spots in my vision that come right before you faint. For these, I made myself actually sit down, close my eyes, and take deep breaths. The light-headedness didn’t really go away but I went back to cleaning anyway. I just bumped my pace down a little and paid more attention to how I was feeling. I’ll admit I was somewhat worried.

This has not deterred me from quitting smoking, but I am going to make an appointment to talk with my doctor about the symptoms I was having yesterday. If I start having them, again, I may just go sit and wait to see if I can get in earlier. Though I’m probably just fine I would rather have someone with the education to say so tell me that I am. Better safe than sorry in this instance, I believe.

Advertisements

About dragonflygypsyusa

Over-thinker with way too much availability to the internet to research whatever might come to mind, amateur photographer, dog enthusiast, learning every day, working on finding my undamaged self.
This entry was posted in Quitting Smoking and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Quitting Smoking, Back at Day 1

  1. Pingback: Its time… | Dragonfly Gypsy USA

Go ahead...I'm listening

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s