What an interesting day yesterday was. Nothing out of the ordinary happened, other than my quitting smoking, but that was enough. Overall, the day wasn’t too challenging, nicotine craving wise, until late in the day, but the feelings were…well, like I said, interesting.
I don’t know if it is just part of the nicotine withdrawals or the increased level of oxygen making it to my brain due to the lack of oxygen inhibiting cigarettes, but I felt a bit loopy a lot of the day. I honestly didn’t really feel grumpy, agitated until late afternoon, but things just seemed a little surreal. Attitude-wise, I was silly-goofy, intense, which was not what I was expecting at all. I was expecting to feel a bit crazy and crazy is how I felt for most of the day. Focus was challenging and my thoughts were pretty scattered.
When the desire to have a cigarette kicked in, it was in the obsessive manner. I was walking to the van with my daughter after leaving Wal-Mart and saw a cigarette butt on the ground. Before I knew it, and without thought, I felt myself stooping to pick it up. I stopped myself and talked with my daughter about it. It was weird. What seemed like a casual observance part of my brain sent into action. To be honest, this alone re-inforced my desire and determination to quit smoking. Anything that can override my conscious decision-making processes needs to go. This is not to say that I am not sitting here longing for a cigarette to go with my coffee and morning blogging, because I am, but I have loaded my tongue with cinnamon flavored breath mints to try to combat the cravings.
I was told once upon a time that cinnamon helps with nicotine cravings. I have passed this tidbit of info to others that were either in the process of quitting or getting ready to quit. I have heard of people applying this to their quitting smoking plan, including my husband when he quit for 4 months, and they all say it definitely helps. Maybe they had more faith in it than I do. I have cinnamon gum and cinnamon breath mints and I don’t feel like either has been any help in reducing the nicotine cravings. Maybe my expectations are too high.
I did take a few puffs off of my husband’s vape pen yesterday and that didn’t really seem to mellow the cravings either. At one point, I became determined to bum a smoke from someone, anyone, and began looking for people smoking. When I finally did see someone smoking, I couldn’t bring myself to ask. I thought about just buying a cigarette but the only way of doing that that I know of is to buy a pack of cigarettes, which I most definitely do not want to do. I’ll smoke them all. Not right away, of course, but I would and then it wouldn’t be quitting smoking anymore.
So, today is day two. I’m interested in finding out how today goes. Wish me luck, keep your fingers crossed, and, should you feel so inclined, send me some positive energy to help me combat the nicotine cravings. Have a most amazing day everyone!!