I have a really intense love of old houses. There is just something about an old house that speaks to my soul, as if the soul of the house is connecting with my own soul. And old farm houses…ugh. I’m completely sunk over those.
This is not a new love. I can’t remember not loving old houses, or at least looking at them and having my soul/imagination get lost in the possible life stories of the house – who lived there, what life looked like for them, the years and years of life lived in that house, and – if the house has been abandoned – the loneliness of the house with only old memories and no new ones being made. Yes, I do understand that the house is an inanimate object, without feelings and all that, but I also believe that a house develops a soul of sorts from the life/lives lived within it, over time.
Anyway, a few months back, I stumbled across a site that speaks to my love of old houses: CIRCA Old Houses. I could spend hours and hours on this site. Ok. I have spent hours and hours on this site. There is a menu option on the CIRCA site called ‘The Magazine.’ If you hover over it, a drop down menu appears. There are 13 options in this drop down menu – Houses Under $50,000 is the one I get stuck on.
Each month, the site puts together a list of about 10 houses for sale for under $50k, written by Elizabeth Finkelstein, the founder of CIRCA. Yes, these are fixer uppers, but some do not have too much to be done to them to take them out of fixer upper status. Oh, and the imagining my brain begins to do and run with. With the right funding, there isn’t a single thing in any of these houses that Lance and I couldn’t do ourselves.
The houses shown are pretty much all on the East coast and in Mid-west, which means they are too far away for me to even go look at them. Yeah, I get it. I don’t have the funding to even embark on such an adventure as fixing up old houses and then re-selling them, but…oh how the mind creates such a beautiful picture. If I could figure out the funding, I believe this would be what I would be doing, with the biggest bonus being that I would end up finding the one that my soul calls home.
At least, that’s the story I’ve been telling myself and it feels so close as to be almost attainable, just barely out of reach. This, of course, gets me trying to think of ways to make it happen. Of course, there are the kids to think of. I know they wouldn’t want to cruise around the US with me, rehabbing houses, and I’m not sure I’m good being that far away from them. Yes, they are adults, creating their own lives, but…well, I still have one at home with me as he figures out what he wants his life to look like. I also think about things like ‘what if things go wrong for one of my kids and I’m across the country from them? How do I help them?’
I get it. They are adults. Part of being an adult is figuring out how to rescue yourself, if/when needed, but I guess I’m just not that type of parent. I have an open door policy with my kids, they can always come home and have a space available to them to collect themselves in and move forward, whether that is with me or moving back out into the world. Being across the country from them makes that so much harder for them to attain, if needed. So many considerations with this ‘old house rehab’ idea/dream, but, as my mind won’t let it rest, I’m sure I’ll continue to try to figure out how I would make the idea/dream come to life and not feel like I would be abandoning my kids in the process of chasing a dream.