Happy 2015, Current Learning Path, Making Change Happen…

Happy 2015 Everyone!! I hope the new year is off to an amazing start for everyone. I had the day off yesterday, so my new year started off perfectly. Though the intention to write yesterday was there, I decided it was time for a trip to the Field of Serenity. Enzo and Achilles started their Jedi training yesterday.

Like this, Mom?

Like this, Mom?

I had brought my camera, which I could have sworn had 3/4 of a battery left, but was dead as a door nail when I took it out at the field. Thank goodness for the camera on my phone.

I drove over to the field, hoping to get there before Lance and the dogs, so I could get a shot of the dogs as they come running out of the bushes and burst into field, ready to play. I was so disappointed that my camera was dead that it didn’t even occur to me to try to get the shot with my phone. It wasn’t until I was telling Lance about it that the thought came to me, just as he started to say it. I may have missed the original shot I was hoping for, but I got to get some fun ones of the little boys with the light saber.

Of course, the rest of the day was spent doing chores: laundry and dishes. I wish laundry didn’t eat up so much time. Not much else gets done on laundry days, though it is always nice to crawl into freshly washed sheets at night.

I’m having some mixed thoughts about going down the path of learning about investing. I am finding that I am becoming less and less content with my job and current socio-economic status. Though becoming discontent about my current socio-economic status isn’t really a bad thing, it’s not such a great thing when that includes my source of income. It makes it really hard to just left foot, right foot it through it. In fact, it makes me not want to do it at all.

I believe I could be really good with the whole investing thing. I completely understand the basic concept (or at least believe I do at this point) but I also realize that I do not have enough knowledge to even begin to think about touching the real aspects of investing. I also get that only having a grasp of the basic concept is not enough.

Then there is the money part. I have none. Or, at least, I don’t have the ‘extra’ money to consider anything other than applying said money to the necessities of (my) life. I’m so sick of living the life I have, struggling just to survive, living so precariously on the edge of keeping it together and tumbling into the abyss of complete financial panic, again. The more audiobooks I listen to about investing, the more anxious I get to try my hand at it. Its frustrating but at least I also have a firm grasp on my reality, at this point.

Attempting to invest in anything at this point would mean taking the much-needed monies and gambling with our survival. I’m not willing to do that. I’m not foolish enough to believe that doing so would guarantee a positive financial change in my world, at this time. Sure, I could get lucky and have everything go great, have the dreams in my head become reality, but the cost would be too great should things go the other way. That said, I will continue my financial education and leave it at that for now.

I have big hopes for 2015. I plan on it being a very busy year because I have some goals I really would like to reach. I’m looking forward to when we can start painting curb address numbers this season. I have a much better handle on our budget, so the money that comes in from paint curbs should have a much greater focus that just a little padding between paychecks. I believe I should be able to really start putting that money toward changing our situation.

I know its going to be a lot of work and I’m probably going to hit points when I have melt downs when I’m feeling overwhelmed, over-worked but I’m ok with that, as long as they don’t derail me from continuing to move forward. I’m going to have to make sure that I am on top of my self-care, even if that means scheduling it in. It really comes down to this: nothing changes if nothing changes, and the changes I want/need only happen with determination, committment, and hard work. I got this.



About dragonflygypsyusa

Over-thinker with way too much availability to the internet to research whatever might come to mind, amateur photographer, dog enthusiast, learning every day, working on finding my undamaged self.
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