The Countdown to Quitting Smoking has Begun…6 more days

quit-smoking

So, I ended up with a pack of cigarettes yesterday.  I had decided that yesterday would be the day that I began the rationing of cigarettes to help begin breaking some of the habitual part of smoking by being even more conscious of when and why I’m having a cigarette and causing me to change-up when I have a cigarette while not going through complete withdrawals. It sounds like a solid plan to me so I am going to stick with it. I have tried quitting cold turkey before and have not been successful at all. Well, I made it a week once.

Anyway, the rationing is going to go like this:

September 24th, 25th, and 26th, I am allowing myself to smoke between 5 and 7 cigarettes.  September 27th, 28th, 29th, and 30th, I will allow myself between 3 and 5 cigarettes. I may end up including September 27th in the 5-7 cigarettes a day category, but we will see how today and tomorrow go. October 1st is the quit day.

Yesterday, I had 6 cigarettes. I see this as the habit is still firmly in place but the desire to quit is putting up a good fight. I have been smoking between 7 and 10 cigarettes a day for…well, most of the time I’ve been smoking, so I think starting out the limiting of cigarettes in the 5-7 zone is appropriate. It’s not complete denial and it is not completely giving in to the habit.

The fact that life is extremely busy right now is a great help. I found that when I had too much time on my hands yesterday was when I wanted a cigarette the most. Boredom makes me antsy. Today isn’t scheduled to be as busy as yesterday so I am going to have to find things to occupy my time and mind.

As I said in my FotP post yesterday, I have downloaded a bunch of meditations onto the sd card in my phone. Who knows? I might just become a meditation guru by the end of this process 😉   I also have ordered a few books through Amazon to help keep my mind busy. Unfortunately, the earliest delivery date for them isn’t until tomorrow. There are a couple of books for next to nothing that I can download from Amazon, but I have found I enjoy reading so much more when I have the physical book in hand(s). I could go to the library to check out some books, but I am hard on books and know that. I tend not to check out books from the library that are for simple enjoyment because of that fact. I may end up just downloading a book or two onto my tablet just to get me through until my books arrive.

So it has begun. I’m optimistic and anxious at the same time. I want this but there is the huge unknown looming in front of me too. There is also the past failures. I know those can’t be my focus, that I have to believe I can do this, and most of me is on board with that. The fear of failure is making sure it is known, though I keep pushing it aside, telling myself that was then, I wasn’t completely ready, I gave in to habit too easily/quickly, this time will be different.

I have had two cigarettes already this morning. I’m going to need to re-arrange/clear off my desk area. Since my desk is outside (the only place I have for it), there is an ashtray on it, right next to the computer. That’s got to go. I also need to have my husband not leave smoking stuffs on the desk. He is trying to quit also but he is using an e-cig/vaporizer to do so. I could try that route, too, but I honestly see that as switching one habit for another. I don’t want to do that. I just want to be done with smoking all together. I know a lot of people have had great success switching to vaping instead of smoking and I think that’s great, for them. They have created a “healthier” habit. I don’t want the habit at all. I can do this. I just have to remain focused, apply self-discipline, don’t give up, make it through the withdrawals knowing it is just part of the process.

Advertisements

About dragonflygypsyusa

Over-thinker with way too much availability to the internet to research whatever might come to mind, amateur photographer, dog enthusiast, learning every day, working on finding my undamaged self.
This entry was posted in Countdown to Quitting Smoking and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to The Countdown to Quitting Smoking has Begun…6 more days

  1. Hey, best of luck quitting that nasty habit. You should use the money saved from not buying cigarettes and go on a vacation 🙂

    Like

Go ahead...I'm listening

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s