Breathe in, breathe out…

I’m sitting out on the make shift deck in front of the door to our travel trailer, drinking my morning coffee, watching the overcast sky lighten. Achilles, Tru-dog, and I have just finished our morning walk and I’m feeling pretty good. Achilles did really well. (for more about that, click the Dogs, dogs, and more dogs menu link above or here)

Lately, I’ve found myself feeling so discontent with RV/travel trailer life that finding joy, even just plain happiness, in the little things in life really difficult. Everything seems irritating, blah. I hate when I get this way.

Finding gratitude can be challenging sometimes. I can make a gratitude list of the things I have to be grateful for, but feeling it? Well, that’s something else entirely.

“Fake it til you make it” I’ve been told. How does one pretend to feel the effects of gratitude? I am grateful for many things in my life, but sometimes it just feels like settling for less than I want. I know that’s not what it is but that doesn’t change the feeling.

Feeling aren’t fact. Well, of course they aren’t, but they are very real. Emotions have always been my downfall. And one of my strengths.

I can get stuck in my emotions. I feel things so strongly that it can be overwhelming sometimes. This also means I tend to understand what someone else is feeling extremely accurately.

Today is going to be a day where my emotions are at the surface. This means stalking my mind to know where im at, communicating with those around me so they aren’t confused by my silence or re-actions. This does not mean a bad day. It’s just a day when I need to be vigilant with self-care.

Anyone care to share what their self-care rituals are? What does it mean to you to stalk your mind?


About dragonflygypsyusa

Over-thinker with way too much availability to the internet to research whatever might come to mind, amateur photographer, dog enthusiast, learning every day, working on finding my undamaged self.
This entry was posted in Left foot, right foot, repeat and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Breathe in, breathe out…

  1. Evelyn says:

    Wow! I like this idea of “stalking your mind.” I’m having a day kind of like this, too. I’m trying to take my normal expectations, and make them lower, and give myself the space to not “feel” the gratitude as I’d wish, but to keep on going anyhow. Thanks for sharing your writing!


    • Thanks, Evelyn! Stalking my mind is something I’ve learned how to do in order to better manage my bipolar disorder. I love how you mention “keep on going anyhow.” Sounds like left foot, right foot, repeat to me!!! 😉 thanks for the comment!


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